(Better known as Sit-Around-Eating-Discount-Chocolate-And-Wishing-You-Had-A-Boyfriend Day.)
I got a bag of those Dove chocolates. You know, the little square ones with Inspirational Quotes™ on the wrappers? I always picture the Inspirational Quotes™ being read aloud by some gorgeous female commercial star, the kind who sits around eating entire containers of ice cream with a dreamy look on her face.
You have to wonder what they’re thinking with some of these quotes. They seem to assume anyone who eats Dove chocolate is single.
And some of them are just plain bizarre.
Look, elevator music doesn’t even have words. Am I supposed to provide my own?
Or I could just kill two birds with one stone, I guess.
…I have to be fair here. There is exactly one piece of chocolate advice I took.